Oh Lighten Up, It's Just a Joke!

Recently, there was an incident in the OR. 

I was scrubbed in, doing a case that I twice a week, every week.  As usual, I had a scrub tech who, despite scrubbing with me many, many times over the past one year, still wants me to do the operation with only the instruments he feels are necessary, not the ones I actually use or need.

I mentioned that these problems could all be solved if they would just break down and give me my own pick list or case card.

His reply? 

"You can't have a card because you're a woman.  You women just change your minds all the time."

For just a second, I stopped, feeling totally offended and disgusted, nearly to the point of nausea.  Then, I just went on my way and continued with the operation.  After all, people say stuff like that to me all the time.  And it was just a joke, right?

A week later, I was scrubbed in with my (male) program director.  The same thing happened--his pick list was all wrong, nothing was ready.  It was like it was the first time the operation had ever been done in the history of the world.  It was like no one had ever seen a scalpel before.

While we were waiting for yet another instrument, I mentioned the prior week's incident to my program director.  He was totally offended for me, and told me to write the guy up for misogyny.

Sheepishly...I had never even thought about writing him up.  I was offended, but seriously, I could probably write up the majority of the hospital for that kind of crap.  I hear it all day long from my junior residents, nurses, scrub techs, secretaries, attendings.  And they all pass it off as a joke!  But the sad thing is...I do, too.  Behavior like that is inexcusable.  I wouldn't say stuff like that to a guy, why do they think it's appropriate to joke around with me?  That tech never in a million years would have said such a thing to my male boss or other male residents.  So why do I let him get away with that with me?

Ultimately, I wrote him up.  Mainly out of my own embarrassment for not standing up for myself right away.  I have to say, I'm a little nervous about seeing this guy, and I hope I don't ever have to scrub with him again.  I worry about backlash.